LIfe, Love and the Big City

Can i just say that over the last year or so I've wanted to live in a big city on where no one knew me I was just there doing my job and just enjoying life. Spring Break was a couple of weeks ago and I got to spend a couple of days in Cincy. Now I've been to Cincinnati several times in my life and more just recently. Cincy was one of the first places that I drove as a 15 1/2 year old who just got her permit scary shit right there...I can remember my hands shaking as I gripped the stearing wheel for dear life as car after car passed me trying to gain some sense of worth to be on this stupid road! Anyway thats really not what I wanted to write about today. On this particular trip to the 'nati as some refer to it (cincinnati is just way to long and cincy is well overused i'll try to keep it from getting too annoying hopefully) anyway, my Dad was going to the 'nati for thursday night and friday night for a home-show and then heading home on friday. Well being the good daughter that I am I decided to go with him and just by chance meeting up with a good friend while i was down there...long story short spent more time with that friend than i did with my own father, sorry dad. I was able to spend most of the day on Friday just walking around the city and I absolutely loved it. I felt free it was great to be able to walk around downtown chillin' out in Starbucks (where this post originated from but I didn't get the chance to finish it) I just loved the atmosphere. Yes of course I enjoy talking with friends and hanging out but I like looking forward to seeing them later in the evening. Like you know after work hours. There are days here at school that I can't even walk 5 steps without running into someone I know. It was just great for me to be able to spend time by myself and no one bothered me except for the occasional homeless person asking for money. I also enjoyed being free, being on my own...living my life. The people walking past me...one didn't give a shit who i was and two didn't want to find out. I could live whatever way that i wanted and not be judge by others because they didn't really care, its my choice.
Let me continue with this point before everything blows up in my face. I was sitting in chapel Monday Jack Hagar spoke, back ground on Jack, he is an alcoholic, drug dealer, convict and now youth pastor. Jack has come to the beach many times and I have loved hearing his message. He spoke of going back to the basics remembering the cross and not worrying about the theology yes it is important but that is not THE important thing. It is Christ and the cross. Now how do I tie this in. For the last couple of months maybe over the last year I've been struggling with the whole christian thing. I sit in a classroom full of "christians" who are so sure about what is right and wrong, that drinking and smoking and cussing and continuing the list are all bad. Here's my problem with this. I don't have a problem with any of these things. I don't feel convicted about them but I will respect my fellow human whether they be christian, Jew, Hindu or whatever religion they may have. Yes, I am a christian but I will not say that I am better than everyone because I have discovered the truth. It all goes back to when you're a child you don't realize that the stove is actually hot until you either touch it or choose to believe mom and dad that its hot. I think Christianity is the same way...you can tell me and tell me that Jesus is the only way but for me the rebelous person won't just believe you I'm going to have to figure it out for myself. So i beg and plead with Christian who might be reading this that you stop this unjustifiable judging unless God has said you...christian judge the world...don't It's his job I will stand before God and God alone for my countless sins. Pray for me pray that I turn back to God not play this whole turn or burn game. The basis the truth of Christianity is love and the suffering that Christ went through on the cross. This is where the love comes into this part of the conversation...love God when you love god with all your heart, all you soul and with all your mind that is loving him with everything you got everything you are and everything that you have become. When you focus on loving God, your love will overflow on to the people around you. You might remember the old hymn "they will know we are Christians by love" thats how we should live a life of love. Love with our whole body the two greatest commandments that were give by Jesus were "to love the lord your god and to love your neighbor as yourself." But i must warn you this is not the love the sinner hate the sin...that is bull shit. No one can do that...most "sinners" use their "sin" as their life...they are defined by that they define themselves by that, so when we use that cliche we ignore the person we are trying to love. Love them no matter what...pray for them...and again i will stress this LOVE THEM!!
I hope this makes sense I hope you have a better understanding of what I am trying to say here. Its so important. Many people like in the big city, like me, are just walking through life not wanting to be noticed...to just be able to live the life that we do, and hating christians in the process because of they way they present themselves...its like the movie saved, that is a very good example of what i'm trying to say here. Don't let people just disappear and slip into the darkness...The people you are walking next to at the mall or on the street are crying out for one thing...Love.